Mid October (an update)

picture of my hand. I was walking, holding the camera. I looked down and thought, "That looks kinda cool," so I took a picture. Not that there's anything great about it. But I like it (I'm not submitting it for a photo class, for heaven's sake!).

Well, since my last real update, I've written about other things that have happened, most notably Elijah's popcorn in the ear and Teancom being sick (fantastically on the same day!). I'll fill in the rest, even though there's not much else that's happened.

General Conference

On the first weekend in October, we joined Rob's family up North for General Conference. It was really nice to be together as a family, to be in the open middle-of-nowhere country air, and to hear from the leaders of our church. The kids loved seeing Grandma and Grandpa again and getting to see their cousins.

While we were there we went to Bert's candy store, which is a candy store you've never heard of and likely never to visit. It is also in middle-of-nowhere, Ohio, but it has some GOOD candy. They sell the world's best candy corn (seriously, it's won awards). This doesn't make the candy corn GOOD, per se. But if it was possible to have candy corn that tastes good, this would be it. (We told a friend about this candy corn and he said, "Yes. But is it so good you would eat it by the spoonful?")

We also picked up the world's best apple cider (which is the world's best AND delicious, unlike the candy corn mentioned above) at Tangeman's Orchard right near Chiara's house. We drank the first gallon in a week and saved 2 more in our freezer to have later in the year. I've decided that next year we'll buy 4 gallons so we can have 1 gallon every quarter of the year. It's SO good. Once you have it, you can't go back to the stuff they sell at the grocery store.

Miciah and the Beast

The next weekend we were supposed to go to an orchard place and pick out pumpkins and apples, but Miciah's behavior was so bad on Friday night that we bowed out of Saturday's activities. Instead we spent the day going over her behavior with her. We made lists of things that she does that will be punished in the future, ways she will receive that punishment (she gets to pick from a list of about 6 things), and what she can expect from us. Also we'll start paying her for a new job: going to bed well. And then we thoroughly defined what "going to bed well" means. We made a chart for both jobs: No Whining and Going to Bed Good. We've already been paying her for No Whining, but we haven't had a daily chart for a while. The girl seems to really jive on charts! And heck, if all it takes is a chart, we can do a chart until she's grown!

Miciah is a logical person. I thought she'd pitch a fit about these lists, since it's more than she's been expected to do in the past. But she just took everything in and nodded. ... By the end of our discussion (which was over a half hour long. Maybe an hour?) she was getting wiggly and I had to remember that she's just a 6-year-old. Sometimes it's hard to remember because she can be so adult.

Oh. The discussion started with us asking if things were going okay for her. Was she having trouble at school, etc.? She said that school had been hard because she's missed a few problems on her math tests. ... Over the course of the 4 tests she's taken, she's missed MAYBE 3 questions. ... So we had a talk with her about how people make mistakes. All of us do. All the time. And as we were talking to her, Rob thought out loud, "You know, I struggle with the same things." I had to laugh about that. Worrying about mistakes is NOT a problem I have. Rob worries a lot about other people's expectations and how he should do things better. I, on the other hand, ... While I would like to improve and be better, I have no crushing feeling that if I don't perform perfectly RIGHT NOW, I'm not a good person. I make mistakes, and honestly, I hope I always do! Mistakes make us human and that's comforting to me. Imperfect things are so much better than perfect things.

... The talk was productive. She was so much better behaved almost immediately! We're now on day 6 since that talk and things have calmed down around here. I'm sure in a few weeks we'll have to come up with something different, but for now, it's working.

Not that every day's been perfect. It's hard for her when she doesn't get to put that little check mark on her chart. :) ... Yesterday she was having a hard time and I've started being a little more sympathetic towards her. I'm trying to remember that she's still a very little person just trying to figure out her emotions. I pulled her aside and said, "Is everything okay? Did you have a hard day?" She said, "I just keep doing everything wrong!" I asked what she'd done wrong. She said, "I didn't stand up this morning when the bus was coming and so my bus driver forgot to pick me up." ... True enough, that's what happened. The bus driver, with me watching, just passed her by. Didn't even slow down. Rob had to take her to school. I made a casual comment after the bus went by that she should stand up in the future, and maybe then the bus driver would see her. It's a new bus driver (as of Monday), and Rob's car was still in the driveway, so there's still some getting used to the route, I'm sure. Anyways, I didn't even DREAM that she would take my comment to mean that the bus passing her by was her fault! I hugged her tight and told her it wasn't her fault.

Mommy Daughter Night

I already sent posted lots of pictures from that night. It was fun to be out, just me and her. It's harder for me to connect to Miciah than to my boys. The boys are very warm and cuddly and Miciah is fast-paced and logical, and in general Miciah can be my most trying child. She's not a BAD kid. She's a GREAT kid. Anyways, it was fun to have a night out just the two of us. Here's one of my favorite pictures from the night:

I thought it was hilarious that she'd put her pumpkin in a seat belt for the ride home!

Teancom Can't Do it Himself

Teancom is almost 2 1/2 years old and he STILL insists that I do everything for him. This amuses me somewhat, but drives me crazy! Why in the world does he still need help eating dinner? He doesn't. Why does he need me to carry him everywhere? Can't he walk? Apparently he can't walk and he has an eating handicap.

I have come up with a theory revolving around Teancom and Miciah. Miciah was independent from the day she was born, with opinions oozing out her ears (much like me--I'm sure you already realized that). From the minute she could walk she DEMANDED to walk. It was frustrating sometimes and it often made her very difficult. Teancom, on the other hand, is the exact opposite on both counts: ultra non-dependent and super easy. I think there's a correlation. Apparently he would not be so easy going, cute, and cuddly if he was also independent. ... So I'll take the non-independence. But come on! It's turning into him just being spoiled and that I can't do.

Take today. We went to the museum and he wanted me to carry him. I asked him repeatedly if he wanted to walk. He said, "No. Carry you." It warms my heart that he says "carry you" when he wants me to carry him. Anyways. I was unmoved by the cuteness when my arm started to fall off. I started to put him down. He did the monkey-cling routine. I pried him off me and went to set him on the ground. He moved his legs out from under him so he couldn't stand. Finally I got him on his feet and on the ground. He ran around in a circle, stomping his feet and crying, and plopped down on the ground, belly-down, to throw a fit. I just looked at him. I tried to coax him into walking. No go. Finally I said, "Look, you can walk! You are 2! So I'll see you later, Teancom," and I started walking on. Thankfully he came to his senses, got up, and ran after me. He walked the rest of the way--even down the escalator! Very brave of him.

So here's me on my quest to make Teancom a non-spoiled kid. I think my efforts will, on the whole, be ineffective, because he really is so stinkin' cute and he totally has me wrapped around his little finger! ... I used to worry about having a favorite child. Good parents don't do that, right? But now I look at people and say, "But he's your favorite, too, right?!!" And he is. He's just likable and cute.

And I brag about him shamelessly.

Tree Pictures

I saw the coolest tree the other week! It is the most impressive-looking fallen tree from Ike that I've seen yet. I don't know how I didn't see it until last week. I've passed it several times.

And the wide shot:

It's right across from Miciah's school. I took the boys with me and they stayed in the van, with the van running, while I got out to take these pictures (I would so NOT have tried this trick with Miciah in the car). ... And even better about the tree: It fell in a graveyard! Awesome. I wanted to walk up and get a closer picture of it, but I felt bad walking through a graveyard to do it. No, I wasn't afraid.

I also went to take a picture of another tree that I've thought of taking a picture of before, cause it intrigues me. They cut a huge chunk out of it so they could save their power lines. So it's got this one tiny limb on one side of it. Anyways, the whole one side of the tree is red with fall and the other limb is still green. I thought it was fun, but the picture didn't turn out like I hoped. Oh well. ... And then I saw another tree, obviously the same kind, that did the same kind of thing: the whole tree was green except one stripe of purple right down the middle! It must be that type of tree. Very fun.

Elijah

Elijah is a delight. He can be so sweet and soft that it amazes me. He often will ask if he can marry me and if I say yes (after hesitating, since I'm already married, and he's my son, and and and, ... I decided what did it matter if I said yes? But just for pretend, I told him) he steals a cute little kiss. Very cute and romantic. He warms me up when he's so soft like that.

He'll often come and tell me he loves me and he'll give me a hug and kiss. Which brings me to a kissing point. I don't know when it happened, but he went from "Kisses are yucky!" to "I want to give you a kiss." :) I like it. I get an Elijah kiss at least once a day, and (like any Mom) I eat it up.

For all his gentleness and softness, he's also expert at bugging his sister. It's funny when she comes home. He changes from the gentle, soft, quiet Elijah he's been all day, into monster, hyper, loud Elijah who bugs his sister relentlessly!

Rob

We are figuring out Rob's work and his calling for church still (will we ever have it "figured out"?). We're learning a lot along the way. I feel like we are stronger as a couple, as individuals, and as a family. We struggle still, and it can be HARD. ... But it's been worth it. I am amazed at the strength the Lord has given us. I feel like I rely a lot on my own strength, but when I let go and ask for my Heavenly Father's help, he always comes through, and I'm stronger than I was on my own. Sometimes I don't know how we ever made it before we needed Him so much! I feel like He blesses us and will continue to stand beside us, and I'm grateful for that.

Tamra

I am writing articles for Rob's sisters' company. They have a magazine type thing and I write articles about family and motherhood. Nothing expert-like, cause that's not my style. A lot of personal experiences. Silly little things that make up motherhood and family. It's fun. I feel like that's finally underway (after almost a year of it being almost underway). I still don't feel like a "writer" yet, but I get paid for what I write and submit, so I guess this is the start of my writing "career." Though this could be the start and the end, all at once. :) I love what I write about and perhaps more will come of it.

Butterflies

Yesterday Elijah was downstairs with me. I was folding clothes. He wanted to help me fold. What impressed me was that he came up to me, grabbed a shirt from the pile and said, "Mom, I want to help. Show me how." I smiled and showed him how to fold. I never realized before that folding clothes involves, basically, one principle: fold in half. So he'd fold things in half, then in half again, and carefully place them in his basket. He folded his whole basket and did so quite well, I thought, for a 4-year-old.

Then I was folding other things and he was walking around and roaring. We walked up behind me and bit my jacket! I was a little annoyed, but realized he had no malicious intent, so I turned around and asked him what he was doing. He said, "I'm a dragon!" I asked if he was a good or a bad dragon. He said he was a good dragon. I asked, "Then why did you bite my jacket?" "Cause I want to play!" I laughed. It was cute. I said, "Alright, what does the playful dragon want to do?" He thought for a minute and said, "Go outside!"

I thought that was a pretty good deal, since he'd probably let me read a book while I sat outside watching him play. So we went outside and I watched him as he demonstrated his new trick: swinging all by himself. He did that for a while and then came and sat down beside me. Suddenly, all super-excited, he said, "Look, Mom! It's a butterfly!" I looked and there it was, a cute little white butterfly fluttering around the swing set. I said, "Oh, yeah. A little white butterfly." He said, "That's cause it's a beautiful day, huh?" I smiled and said, "A beautiful day?" He further explained, "Yeah. When you see a butterfly, that means it's a beautiful day."

I hugged my little man and thought about how simple and beautiful the world is to him. I thought that it was indeed a beautiful day.