Stories to tell about the kids and the holidays. Along the way, maybe we'll get an update out of it. We'll see.
Holiday Shopping
When my mom was in town we went shopping at a mall with the two boys. My boys aren't used to malls, since I go to a mall about once a year, usually against my will (or at least it's not normally my idea). They were pretty good, considering it'd already been a long day. We went into our second store, JCPenny's. Mom was standing in line to buy what we came for and Teancom ran off (following Elijah's lead). This is quite unusual for Teancom, so I was surprised by the mere fact that he ran off, and he ran away far enough that I wasn't sure where he was. I found Elijah, commanded him to stay with my mom and then went to find Teancom. My mom directed me to where he was, which was directly opposite from the direction I thought he'd gone. I couldn't find him for what seemed like 5 minutes (really it was less than a minute). During those 5 minutes Insane Mom came to the surface.
If you've ever not been able to find a child for any amount of time, you are well acquainted with Insane Mom. The voices in your head go something like this: "I'm sure he's safe. He's just around the corner. I'll find him. It hasn't been long enough for someone to snatch him away. Besides, if that happened, there are security measures I can take. He's just hiding behind something and he'll show up soon. How long has it been, 30 seconds? Highly unlikely that someone's taken him away. Crap, what if someone took him? What would I do? I need to stay calm. ..." All of that goes through your mind in a flash, and it completely skews your concept of time. You're also listening to your audible voice as you call your child's name, hearing that it's not quite calm-sounding, even though you're trying so hard.
Teancom was fine, of course. He popped out from behind a clothes rack and said in his cutest playful voice, "Ta da!" Insane Mom was relieved and I had to resist the urge to run to him melodramatically and hug him while I gushed pitifully. Instead, I did the right thing: I walked to him with my Serious Mom face on and spanked his butt. While he cried (over the shock more than anything--he so rarely gets spankings) I scolded him with harshness in my voice and talked about how it was NOT funny and he was to NEVER do that again. Then I picked him up and hugged him and carried him back to where my mom and Elijah were. ... And then I let my heart rate return to a normal pace.
Christmas Spirit
On some beautiful December evening, we all walked out of our house to go somewhere. Rob was holding Teancom and he saw the neighbor's Christmas lights. He said, "It's Christmas! It's beautiful! I like it." Rob and I have been saying that to each other over and over.
I didn't really get into the Christmas Spirit this year until Christmas Eve, and it was pretty much gone by mid-day on Christmas day. I just didn't have it in me this year. Maybe it's an every other year cycle? Cause we went all out last year and I did almost absolutely nothing this year. We'll have to see how next year goes.
Christmas Eve
We spent Christmas Eve with the Joneses (if you can't keep up with them, join them!) and it was wonderful. They had made sugar cookies and we all got to frost them in a frenzy of icing and sprinkles. Then we went carolling and it was delightful. Another family joined us for the frosting of the cookies and the carolling. They aren't members of our church, so I asked them if they sing Joy to the World with the phrase "saints and angels" or "heaven and angels"--I know different people sing it differently. Well, she was pretty shocked when I asked her and had me repeat it because she thought I'd said that we sing it "Satan's angels." That was pretty much the highlight of my night. They sing it "heaven and NATURE," and that's how we sang it when we went carolling.Elijah's Apology
A few weeks ago Elijah had done something to something of mine and whatever it was ended up breaking in the process. I knew Elijah didn't do it on purpose, but it still frustrated me that he broke the item (it was clearly an important item since it comes so readily to my memory). Elijah's a sweetheart, though, and so he said, "I'm sorry," very genuinely. Our usual response to this is "It's okay." But it wasn't okay that he'd broken it, and I told him so. He paused after I finished telling him I was still frustrated and he looked down. Then he looked back up at me and with all the innocence of a child, he said, "Will you forgive me?" ... This of course made me pause, too, and all my frustration was lifted away. It's as if Elijah were looking at me and saying, "Where are your priorities? Is that item more important than me? Are you going to let your frustration stand in the way of forgiveness?" I kneeled down in front of him and gave him a hug and told him that I absolutely did forgive him. What a sweet boy.
Back to Work
Through a series of small unfortunate events of our own, we had several days at home after Christmas. We were supposed to play with friends on Friday but I got HIT with some stomach bug that Miciah and Teancom also had. I slept nearly all day, and when I wasn't sleeping I was lounging about, moving as little as possible, and reading a book. On Saturday we were supposed to go north to visit with Rob's family, but of course it hinged on us being healthy. I woke up Saturday feeling better (though it's all relative--still the most active thing I did all day was vacuum the living room floor, and I had to rest for 20 minutes afterwards), but Rob woke up puking. Nice. So we both sat on the couch all day feeling pretty lousy. No trip up north. Sunday morning, however, found us feeling MUCH better and we were able to go see his family then. Fortunately everyone was able to re-arrange their schedules so that we could see everyone on Sunday, and we're grateful for that.
On Monday our furnace tried to break. (This story is all connected, I promise.) It's given us problems for years, the poor old thing. It's almost as old as I am, and for a furnace, that's ancient. So we spent Monday getting free estimates on furnaces. The first guy who came got it working again (by tapping on a part. Who knew to tap on that part?), so that's good. But because of the furnace issues and all the salesmen in and out, Rob didn't go into work on Monday or most of Tuesday and significant parts of the other days, too. (We have decided to hold off on buying a furnace for now. We'll wait for it to out-and-out break, I think.)
Looking back, I feel a little guilty about the whole thing. My entire desire this year was to lay low this holiday break. I wanted to be at home on Friday, Saturday and Monday, but we had plans on Friday and Saturday (good plans, of course, but still plans), and Rob was going back to work on Monday. I told Rob that apparently God answered my prayers in ways I wouldn't have asked for (and did NOT ask for), but the end result was that we had a lazy few days at home together doing nothing at all.
Because of all the time off, Elijah was just used to Rob being at home. When Jan. 5th came along and Daddy had to be at work, Elijah wanted to call him. He asked where Daddy had gone and seemed somewhat perplexed when I told him that Daddy had to work. Anyways, when he was talking to Rob on the phone he said this phrase and I thought it was the cutest thing ever. A cute, sad little boy saying to his daddy: I should've gived you a hug when you leaved.
Holding Out for a Hero
For my birthday in June my brother gave me an iPod. This isn't the family iPod, it's mine, and I love it. I listen to it while I'm driving (which is MY music time, not music time for the kids), and I usually just go to my entire song list and hit random. I love listening to it this way: I get to listen to some songs I've temporarily forgotten about, it mixes it up and gives me variety, and most fun of all, it gives me insights into what kind of music my children like. Elijah's new favorite song that we discovered this way is Holding Out for a Hero by Bonnie Tyler. I happen to have 3 versions of this song (the other 2 from the Shrek 2 soundtrack (Jennifer Saunders is genius)) and his very favorite is the original 80's version. It's like 6 minutes long, but he loves every second of it and asks for it over and over again. He beats his arm to the rhythm. And he calls the song his Superman song (I assume because it says the word 'hero' in the song).
Well, there's just so many times you can listen to a song like Holding Out for a Hero. It's a fantastic song, don't get me wrong, but at some point, 18 minutes into it (that's 3 listens for you math-inclined people), your eyeballs feel like they might fall out. So on a drive we told Elijah we had to just move on to the next song. He objected, but come on! It went next on the random play to Credence Clearwater Revival's Have You Ever Seen the Rain. I said, "Everyone likes Credence Clearwater Revival!" Elijah listened for another few seconds and then passed his verdict: "Borrring!"
I have since realized that just about every song is boring next to Holding Out for a Hero! The song goes about 100 mph. So last time we listened to my iPod in the car, I moved it to my dance playlist and then the songs weren't boring.
I love that Elijah likes songs with a hard beat. He always has (and Miciah generally always hasn't. Teancom hasn't put his opinion on the board yet). The other day he wanted to listen to music at dinner, so we turned some on (again, randomized on my song list), and some of the harder rock stuff came on. Elijah turned to Rob and explained to him that he liked these sorts of songs because they'd "make [him] grow big and strong." Sweet!
The wii
This is many stories all rolled into one, and it starts with some sad news.
Bernar
Bernar, who has been staying at our home several nights a week for almost 2 years now, came home 2 weeks before Christmas and informed us that he'd just been laid off. Bummer! I stayed somewhat composed for a little while and then I bawled for the next 2 hours. Bernar has become part of our family and we will miss him dearly (we already do!).
When he came home that day, he had 2 Christmas gifts for us. I didn't look at them, I just carried them in a bag back to our bedroom where we were keeping all the gifts until Christmas Eve (when the kids carry them under the tree--totally a fun tradition!). After he'd left, I took the gifts out of the bag and set them out. I looked at the bigger box and thought, "Something about the weight and shape of this box is really really familiar."
Back story
(The back story here is that we'd decided in January to get the wii for Christmas. That was ALL we were getting. We'd purchased the wii in August (actually, a friend purchased it for us in Colorado of all places), and it had been sitting in our closet since then, though we'd opened it and made sure it worked first.)
So I got the wii box out of the closet and put it on top of the gift from Bernar. Same size. Same weight. Not good.
I made Rob call Bernar (since I still was not very composed) and ask him if that's truly what it was. Yep. So now we had 2 wii's. Instead of finding someone to sell the other wii to, we just offered for Bernar to take it back and keep the money. He agreed it made more sense for him to take it back, but then gave us $200 instead. We ended up making the wii from him and all the accessories were from us (and there are too many accessories!), which meant we could then afford MarioKart, the other game we were saving up for.
Interesting wii Sideline
(I e-mailed Bernar and told him we'd like to make the wii from him, but that next time we saw him (which would be sometime over the break), we would give the wii back to him so he could return it. He called me and said that'd be fine and that they'd be coming up to Cinci sometime during the break to do some shopping. Fine. ... He called me back about 5 minutes later and said that he just looked at the receipt and that he had 7 days to return the wii, and that today was day 7.
Miciah's Room
Back to Bernar losing his job. We were sad to tell the kids. Elijah decided that even though Bernar didn't have a job, he could still live with us, and if he got a job in Cincinnati again, he could come back. When I told Miciah, she was respectfully sad for a moment and then she looked at me and said, "Does this mean I get my own room?" I told her that if she wanted (and we weren't sure she would want), she could move down into that room. She said she did want that, and after one more night in her old room (at her request), she moved downstairs. This change has been WONDERFUL for everyone. I knew it'd be good for Miciah, but it's been good for the boys and for me and Rob as well. So, as sad as we are that Bernar is gone, it's been fantastic for the family that Miciah now has her own space.
Having said that, if Bernar wanted to come back, we'd kick her back up to the boys' room. He was a delight and a blessing to us.
I have just now decided to make a separate post of Christmas morning.
Miciah and the Reindeer
We took some cookies to our neighbors (the ONLY people we brought goodies to. We were SLACKERS this year), the Jaspers. They are so nice to us, especially the kids. They invited us in and gave our kids something yummy to eat. While we were there, Mrs. Jasper offered Miciah a reindeer. She said she'd had it for years and years and was ready to get rid of it. She talked to her like it was one-on-one, all cute-like, with her arms on Miciah's shoulders: "If your parents will let you, you can take it home. It comes with a bear for your middle brother, and a mouse for your littlest brother. Would you like to take it home and put it in your bedroom and take good care of it?" To everyone's shock, Miciah said no. Rob asked her why she didn't want it, cause it was fine with us. Miciah said, "Well, if Santa wants to bring his reindeer on Christmas Eve, he can do that, but I don't want a reindeer in my room!" We all laughed and laughed that Miciah thought Mrs. Jasper was offering her a REAL reindeer.
She showed Miciah the little wooden reindeer and Miciah immediately said she'd love it. And they have loved it. Thank you, Jaspers!
Miciah's Gym Teacher
Some of the excitement and craziness of our break revolves around the fact that Miciah's gym teacher passed away the day before Christmas. She was in her late 20's, Miciah said, and the news reported that she'd been killed by her ex-boyfriend. Scary! So it was a little crazy having to explain to Miciah that her gym teacher had passed away and to talk about murder. ... I attended a little conference that the school put together the Friday before school started back up. Had an expert on child grieving, particularly in school settings. It was interesting, he was very informative, and I felt like I then had SOME idea of how to talk to Miciah about all this. She's had people in her life that have died, but no one's been murdered. That's a whole different set of issues. ... They also talked about how the school would be handling it when the kids got back.
Miciah has now met the new gym teacher (a recently retired gym teacher who has agreed to stay on until they find a permanent replacement, or till the end of the school year, whichever comes first) and she reported that "she's the nicest person in the world!" and then added, "except for you Mommy." What shocked me about the last part was that it seemed so genuine. I can think of about 1,000,000 people who are all nicer than I am. :) But it was a cute sentiment anyway.
$17.95 Oil Change
Over the break we got oil changes and tire rotations on both vehicles. We are realizing, now that we're consciously budgeting for our cars, that it takes more money than we thought to maintain vehicles.
And what's the catch on a super cheap oil change? "Free inspection." Did we ask them to do a free inspection? No. Rob showed up to change cars (van for the car) and they showed him the list of things they'd found wrong and/or things they'd suggest doing. Total price for everything they found, parts and labor? $819.25. Nice. Granted, some of the work we already knew needs to be done. But it makes me instantly skeptical when someone lures you in with a cheap oil change price to come up with a self-serving $819.25's worth of work. They found another $175.69 for the Corolla.
Worse than the price tag for what they found? One of the things they said needed fixed very soon: the back brakes. So now everywhere we go, Rob's worrying about the brakes.
Rob: "Do the brakes feel stickier to you?"
Me: "What does 'stickier' even mean?"
So what is the REAL cost of a $17.95 oil change? $21.83, all said and done (where's that $17.95?). PLUS, knowing that your vehicles have $994.94's worth of work waiting to be done (or, alternately, that the place you took your vehicles to was trying to swindle you into THINKING there was that much work to be done), and your peace of mind.
Next time maybe we'll just pay double and skip the free inspection.
Teancom's Elf
Teancom still loves and adores his elf that my mom made him. We lost it for a week or so. Then I took down the Christmas tree and found the elf behind the couch (and another favorite toy of his, a donkey, nestled in the branches). He was happy to have it back. It is his best friend and it's adorable! I walked into the dining room one morning to hear him saying, "Elf is so beautiful!" That made me laugh, and I made him repeat it, just to make sure I heard it right.
He also has refused to eat dinner once until he was holding elf. Usually this is against the rules (no toys at the table), but there are occasionally times to break this rule, and this particular time seemed one of those times. He promised to actually eat if he was holding elf, and I thought that once he was holding elf, he'd forget all about that promise. But he actually held his end of the bargain. And instead of deciding that now elf sat with him for every meal, at the next meal he handed elf to me and said, "Don't want elf get dirty!"
He also insisted that he take elf to church with him (also against the rules, but again, it seemed an appropriate time to break that rule). We told him elf had to be quiet (there's a bell on the elf), and he told us he'd keep elf quiet. For the most part he did. I took him to the bathroom to wipe his nose and the whole way there and back he was stretching out elf's arms and saying, "Elf touch wall!" "Elf touch mirror!" Totally cute.
Another day he insisted that I hold elf's hand, and then that I tickle elf's feet.
If you timed your reading of this post, and you logged over 2 hours, I apologize. And let me know, I'll increase the warning time at the start of the post.
Tamra
1 comment:
First time I've read your update on your blog! (I usually read the email version.) I'm sorry to hear about Bernar's job, Miciah's gym teacher, your stomach bug, but I enjoy catching up on your news!
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