September 12, 2000 – Hearing Rob Sing
At this point in our relationship, I was desperately looking for ways to spend time with Rob. Without being incredibly forward and asking him out every night, I had to look for other things to do. So I kept watch. For instance:
example A: I wanted to go to World of Dance. Rob also wanted to go. I mentioned World of Dance to him and made sure that we decided to go together. Very innocent, of course, but, I will admit, conniving. We ended up going together (we don’t remember the exact date, but it was probably some time in September), but only because shortly after he bought the tickets I called him up and asked him about it. He had forgotten that we had decided to go together and was about to ask another girl. This is why I called, cause I figured he had forgotten. We had a fun time together.
Rob: I was going to ask Shanda (remember Shanda from the Ward FHE). I had decided that I was doing too many things with Tamra and that I needed to broaden my horizons. I didn’t really want to go with Tamra but I remember this date being quite a pivotal moment in our relationship. After this date, I spent really most of my time with Tamra. If I had asked Shanda to World of Dance I might not be writing this story.
example B: Rob and Dave, Rob’s room mate, ended up being my hometeachers. Coincidental, again, but okay with me. In fact, I had people tell me that I couldn’t date Rob cause he was my hometeacher. We were dating BEFORE he was made my hometeacher, so I said it was okay. Anyways. When Rob and Dave had their first tests, I brought them both a half gallon of ice cream and a note. Mainly I did this so I could bring a note and ice cream to Rob and see him again. I figured if I included Dave, it would be a little less obvious that I was mercilessly courting Rob. I had no interest in Dave. … Rob still cites this instance as why he married me. He was conditioned to like me: Tamra = ice cream. Ice cream = good. Tamra = good.
example C: I would randomly show up at Rob’s apartment to talk. It would be to talk to Rob, but sometimes he wasn’t there. So I’d talk to Dave or any of the other guys. It helped, again, that Dave was my hometeacher, so I could use that as an excuse. I don’t think Rob noticed that I was just “popping up” in random places of his life. One of the times I showed up Rob was in the shower, so I talked to Dave until Rob was out. Dave was a dufus. He infuriated me. He said that night that men and women don’t talk the same language and it’s impossible to communicate across genders because women are so touchy-feely and all men think about is football and doughnuts. I said that Rob was good at communicating with women. Dave said that most men aren’t like Rob. And with Rob in earshot I told Dave that I would marry someone like Rob, and not someone like him.
example D: I found out, craftily, what most of Rob’s schedule for the day was. So I knew at certain times he would be passing by certain places of campus, most likely. So I would go and study on the grass by the sidewalk in hopes of seeing him. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t. In my defense, I liked to study on the grass around campus anyway and people-watch. It’s comforting to me. And also in my defense, often when he’d finally come I’d be asleep, so it was his choice to wake me up and say hi. The first time he woke me up to say hi it freaked me out and I think I jumped.
example E: And my example E is September 12, going to hear him sing. He had said he liked to sing and said he was pretty good at it. So I told him, more than once, that I wanted to hear him sing. He had mentioned that he was going to go sing at some function his grandmother was having. I tried to be as casual as possible and say that I wanted to go. I think he almost didn’t invite me to go (it wasn’t one of those kinds of functions where you invite people to hear you sing), and I think I had to call him again and ask him about it. But, eventually what I wanted happened, and I got to go. That’s the night I met Aunt Becky. She was accompanying Rob. I fell in love with her cause she’s so stinkin’ funny. Grandma and Grandpa D were there but didn’t have much time to do more than say hi to me once. They were in charge of the function.
Rob: I believe I sang “Old Man River,” and “Honor and Arms.”
I was blown away by Rob’s voice and I fell in love with him even more.
Afterwards he said he wanted to eat, so asked if I had time to go out to eat with him. Really I didn’t, but I wanted to be with Rob, so I said yes. We went to some Mexican restaurant in downtown Provo. I don’t remember the name of it, but it’s on the NW corner of University Avenue and Center Street. We had a good time, as we always did. I was often asking Rob questions as some sort of “test” to see what he’d say. I remember on a different night, after we’d gone to see a BYU Men’s Soccer Game and we were walking home, I asked him what his philosophy of life was. I remember the answer he gave me because it’s the same answer he still would give and has given several other times. He said, “eternal.” Eternal? He explained that on his mission he was challenged by another elder to come up with a one-word answer to how we should live. Of course, this is difficult to do, and he searched the scriptures to come up with eternal. We should live our lives eternally. (At least that’s how I’ve always understood the answer.) I remember not quite liking the answer (I wasn’t sure it fit the question of the philosophy of life), but I was impressed none-the-less. Anyways, to say the least, Rob was quickly passing with flying colors all the tests I was throwing at him.
At this restaurant they sat us at a booth with two names on them. A guy’s name on one side and a girl’s on the other. I asked what these were for. They said they were the names of people who had met at the booth and later got married. I remember thinking that I was sad that Rob and I hadn’t just met that day so our names could get on a booth, too.
I also insisted on paying. I had to really insist. I remember him objecting and me looking at him and saying that he had paid for me and a bunch of girls just 2 weeks prior and asking him if he was made of money. He said he wasn’t and actually was having to work hard to put himself through school, and that really money was tight. What a goofball, insisting on paying when money was tight! I told him money wasn’t so tight for me, so I was going to pay. He was grateful.
And I wasn’t even late to what I was supposed to be at. I don’t remember why, but I had an interview with the Bishop. It was probably a get-to-know-you type interview. Maybe it was for a calling, I don’t know. But the bishop was running late anyway, so it didn’t matter.
written Spring 2006
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